Happy Halloween!

Well, it's past midnight and registering as Friday the 31st, so I guess I am safe to wish you all a:

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!

Have a good one, enjoy your trick-or-treating, and stay out of the road. :D

More of the same

As far as I know, Saskia is still in the NICU. I really wish she were at Children's Hospital (Metro City has an entire hospital specializing in pediatrics!) but Caroline gets defensive any time you question the Metro U. doctors. I think she's keeping it together by telling herself that Saskia's getting the best possible care, so I hate to push it, but I don't trust them. I don't know how they think Caroline and Mr. C are supposed to pay for all this- she works at a gas station and he works for Sears, for crying out loud! I don't think they care. I think they're out to bilk them for all they're worth and move on once they've cleaned them out. Metro U. Hospitals have always been renowned, but this whole episode has caused my opinion of them to drop several (thousand) notches.

Let the sucking commence

The Dyson is here! I haven't given it its test run/maiden voyage yet, but that will probably take place on Sunday. For some reason, I caught Mr. Samoa trying to stuff extra parts from the old Eureka onto it. Now, the Dyson already has these attachments, so he never could give a good account of himself as to why we might need them: he much preferred to repeat "But I wanted to see if they would fit! I thought we might need them!" and not elaborate as to why he had come to this conclusion. I blame brain rot from the Mucinex.

Signs of improvement

I continue to feel better, though I could wish the cough would go away. Now to convince Mr. Samoa that he needs to get seen. I am thinking I will need a blunt instrument for this.

Sigh, again

So I woke up this morning and my sinuses were on fire. :P Call in, off to Urgent Care. This time I went to the one where we take the residents. I feel better after taking the meds they gave me, so I think this one might actually be hopeful. IhopeIhopeIhope. I am so sick of being sick, I could scream. :P

No real good news anywhere. Saskia is still in the NICU. Every time they get ready to send her home, the little stinker has another bout of apnea. :( She is sooo going to hear about this at her prom!

I suck

Or I am going to, anyways. The ancient Eureka canister vacuum finally gave up the ghost this afternoon. It turned onto its side, which triggered the automatic shutoff. All very well. But then it never came back on, ever. Even after I checked the dustbag, let it cool down, everything. And of course this was about halfway through my vacuuming job. I finished the work as best I could with broom and dustpan, then hauled the thing to the trash cans. I thereupon hit amazon.com and ordered a refurbished Dyson for $250. It'll be winging its way here as of Monday. I sort of informed a rather amazed Mr. Samoa of all this when he returned from walking pups. Hopefully, it and I will have many happy years together.

Still coughing

And now so is Mr. Samoa. Mr. Samoa never gets sick. I literally think the last time he got sick was 2002. What is this crap, anyways?

The other side of the coin

So Tricia and I are at the grocery store. We are stuffing the contents of the THREE FREAKING GROCERY CARTS FULL into the van, when the gentleman parked behind us toddles by. "Quite a job you have there!" he said sympathetically. "Yup!" I chirped, thinking of the earlier memo. He loaded his own groceries and then paused. "Ma'am, would you like some help?" he asked.

Now, I normally suffer from the fibromite's curse of allowing one's lips to be cut off via chainsaw before accepting help, but today was different. I don't know if it was the rain, or my STILL aching shoulder, or what, but I, for once in my life, had the sense to ACCEPT. Yay! We chatted a bit, finished loading, and then he rode off into the sunset in his rusty pickup truck.

When my world domination plot comes to fruition, he and his shall live. :D

Still more work FAIL

If you want people to help out over the weekend, the best way of achieving same is not to post a memo that basically amounts to "Eff you all, I don't want to hear it." I might have been sweet-talked into helping, yet again, had you not posted same.

That is all.

On a happier note

Mary is home and seems to be doing OK. Also Mr. Samoa and I carved pumpkins. I carved one to look like a kitteh. And then we roasted the seeds. Snacks for all!

Well, feh

Saskia has had another setback. :( Apparently she had a bout of sleep apnea, on the very day she was to be released. So, they're keeping her another five days. At least this is some semblance of an excuse, but if they don't give her back at the end of the five days, Aunt Zen is gonna open up a can of whoop ass. Caroline is doing about as well as can be expected, but this is getting pretty old for her too. :( This is about enough!

A real baby update

Finally, finally got ahold of Caroline! As I surmised, she is dividing her time between NICU and sleep. Saskia was to be moved to the regular floor last night, and if she makes a go of that, they are going to release her. Considering that I can see no reason why she would not, we may soon have mad baby snugglez!!!

Now the bad news. "Mary", my favorite resident, spent the weekend in ICU. She had an Unfortunate Medical Event that may have left her with brain damage. :( Prayers, thoughts, spells, etc. would be greatly appreciated from all readers.

A-haunting we will go

Well, did go. Me and Mr. Samoa, anyways.

Bugpit is located in Ohio. Each year, the Ohio Statehouse does a Haunted Statehouse tour. Thus:

http://www.ohiochannel.org/your_state/ohio_statehouse/communications/press_releases/press_release.cfm?release_id=94595

I had not heard of it before this year, so we decided to go. Neither of us had been to the Statehouse since elementary school, so it was a blast from the past in more ways than one. We had a nice time. There were a few screechy kids, but I had my cane, so their parents at least made a stab at roping them in. (Not that I'm not grateful, but isn't it a bit pathetic that you have to have a visible disability before parents decide that you're worthy of not getting squashed by little Boopsie? :P ) I got a T-shirt and (drumroll) Mr. Samoa actually purchased a souvenir! He got a little wooden cube puzzle. I think this is the closest we've come to a date night in about three years wherein disaster has not struck!

Baby non-update

I'll give you an update for real, if I can ever get ahold of Caroline. :P I am guessing that her time is divided 50/50 between the NICU and sleeping, so haven't pressed it. I am going to go guerilla and show up at her house unannounced if I don't hear anything by mid-next week.

Worrying

I don't know. I guess I'm being a worrywart, and I so do not want to turn into that horrid friend/relative who bosses the new family around without having a clue and will not freaking go home, so this is probably the only place I'll ever actually say it aloud. But, I am worried.

I think Metro U. is jerking around Caroline and Mr. Caroline. While Caroline isn't the most communicative person on the planet (she's basically a female Mr. Samoa in that regard), what I am getting from her is that they are not giving straight answers as to when she will be able to take Saskia home. They are also, at least to my jaundiced eye, acting like the baby belongs to the hospital and they are ever so magnanimously deigning to let Caroline and Mr. Caroline have her. They're making her take a "discharge class" that goes over things like baby CPR and baby care and stuff. While I can see the value of training infant CPR, why the hell do people need a baby care seminar? If they're like most new moms, that's all they've been studying for nine months! Moreover, if it were me, you would NOT be placing conditions on how I can take MY child home and care for MY CHILD unless there are concrete health and safety issues. And if there are, you would be getting a warrant allowing you to place these conditions. Otherwise, it would not be happening. I gave Caroline a very watered-down response version of the above, and she said, "Oh, well, they just strongly recommend it, you don't have to." "Good", I thought. "Because what would be getting discharged would be my Mag-Lite, upside their skulls, if they dared tell ME what to do."

Moreover, we were talking, and she said, "..blah blah they let me change her diaper today." Whoa whoa whoa. What do you MEAN let? This is HER child. SHE lets THEM do things, not the other way around. Oh, and did I mention they're not giving straight answers?

I wouldn't be so worried, but neither Caroline nor Mr. Caroline are very aggressive people, and I don't want them to get taken for a ride or pushed around because they don't know they can stand up for themselves, you know? The more I think about this, the more I think that I will handle it thusly. I will say something gentle like, "You know, this is your child, and you can make whatever decisions you wish. You are in charge." or something to that effect. I feel, upon contemplation, that she doesn't yet realize that she is basically God in terms of advocating for this child and she and Mr. C make the decisions; not me, not the hospital, not anyone else. Perhaps helping her realize that is what I am supposed to do in the end.

Slipknot chick is in the clink

So they have finally, finally arrested Casey Anthony on murder charges. Next up, people: Water is wet and the sky is blue. :P

Again with the catching up

The good news is, I think I'm on the tail end of this cold. After only a month. :P The bad news is, I'm now really tired. Yay! :P

Baby viewing, the full version

So I finally have time for the full version, thus, here it is.

Baby Saskia (not her name, but one of my picks, so it's going to be her Zen Name) was born Sunday afternoon. I had originally been intended to be there, but Caroline's labor went so fast that Mr. Samoa and I were unable to make it. Thusly, we decided that we would make the trek last night after Mr. Samoa got off of work.

I got out of work myself at three yesterday, and went home to walk pups. This being done, I headed off to Voldemart to get baby gifts. I had intended to leave with roses and a mat for the birth record I stitched. I left with: the roses, the mat, a card, a bag of chocolates for Caroline, an adorable pink knit hat and mittens set with roses on them, a pink and purple sleep sack (JFGoogleIt, I'm lazy), and a gift bag for all of same. What can I say, I was sucked in by the lure of Voldemart.

At five, I arrived at Mr. Samoa's office to drag him out. This is generally no small task, and yesterday was no exception; I used the time to put the birth record in the mat. At ten after five, I dragged him out by the hair and stuffed him into the car. Due to Saskia's prematurity, she and Caroline were two hours away at Metropolis University Hospitals. So, off we schlepped.

We actually made it in an hour and 45. We parked in the parking garage, then realized no one had cash for the attendant. "No matter," I said, "there is an ATM inside." This will get important in a bit.

Hopped in the elevator, made it up to the seventh floor where Caroline and Mr. Caroline were to be found. You have to get through an airlock system to get to the mothers' rooms. I was tempted to have work fax them a copy of my background check and fingerprinting, but resisted. We then trooped down a long hallway (I expected some villain to jump out from behind a meal cart at any moment) to Caroline's room.

Caroline and Mr. C were looking very well. Caroline was wayyy bouncier than Tagalong had been after having Daisy, but Caroline does not have a flair for the dramatic so I imagine this was to be expected. All the presents were appreciated, but Caroline leapt upon the chocolate directly. :D At Metro U Hospital, the babies do not room in, and Saskia was in the NICU so was on the floor below. As there was only one visitor at a time allowed in, with a parent, it was decided that her Aunt Agony (there also) and I would be the ones to go while Uncle Fester and Mr. Samoa stayed behind. As Mr. Samoa and I had been there longer, I got to go first.

Caroline and I trooped down a floor, and through still more airlocks. They make you do a surgical scrub before you go in. "Oh, you don't have to do that, just wash your hands," said Caroline. I had come almost straight from work. I did the surgical scrub. :P

We went through the final airlock, and there she was, in her little incubator. Only parents and grandparents could touch (I was somewhat relieved, having come from Germ Hell) but I could look and take pictures. Dear readers, Saskia is beautiful. I swear she looks exactly like the picture of Briar Rose that I stitched in her birth record. Caroline and I were sitting there: "Dude! You made that! Isn't that wild?" "Yeah! It's crazy!" "Totally!". Beavis and Butthead do the NICU. ;) She looks a bit like Caroline's mom, who I really wish could have lived to see her. Perhaps she did get to.

After standing there enthralled for several minutes, we reluctantly went up to switch out for Aunt Agony, and Mr. Samoa and I began the trek back home. This was when we discovered that neither of the ATMs in the place liked Mr. Samoa's debit card. As nearly as we could tell, this had something to do with the events of the Miss Butterhorn festival last month. So I dug through my purse and found enough change to get us sprung from the garage. I got us dinner at Dave's Daughter's Fast Food on the way home, as is tradition on late-night trips home from Metropolis.

I can't wait until she gets home so we all can hold her, but there's time enough. As a wise person said, babies don't spoil, and we have eighteen years. :D

Man!

Baby viewing is, apparently, very strenuous, as I am wasted. :P

Baby viewing

Carolinelet is gorgeous. She is TEENY- Barney the Cat is bigger than she is! We could not hold her due to NICU policies, but she has a ton of dark hair and really long fingers. She got really wiggly when she heard Mommy's voice! :D She is going to be absolutely stunning.

The important one first

CAROLINELET IS HERE!!!!

If you hadn't surmised from the pink, we have a girl. Saskia was born about four hours ago. Caroline's labor was, alas, too short for me to get there, but Mr. Samoa and I are headed up tomorrow. YAYYYY!

More work FAIL

So, today, the toll at work stood thus: One quit with less than 24 hours' notice, one was fired due to a no-show (it did not help her case that she was also the perp of the bangs trim) and one had the day off but nobody knew it. I haven't lost it and started crying at work in over a year and a half. I did today. :P Fun times!

Aarghh.

I am going to strangle Mother.

Without typing details that it's too late to go into that in-depth, and besides it'll just piss me off all over again, the gist is this. You know, some people don't have relatives who even WANT them at family gatherings. Mr. Samoa's relatives can't even be arsed to invite him any more. So, if yours DO want you there, perhaps you should be flattered instead of pissed off. (I'm talking to YOU, Mother!)

That is all. :P

Work work work

Still working. Still trying to find time to blog. I am going to do my damnedest not to get suckered into work this weekend, as I am also still coughing. :P

TODAY

Tackled the fair again, with much better success. Very tired now. :P Still coughing. I figure I'm going to cough forever at this rate.

MONDAY

Work was interesting. One of the staff apparently didn't know we're not supposed to cut the residents' hair ourselves and gave Gina this "bangs trim" that made her look like the fourth Stooge. The hairdresser was able to effect some marginal repairs. :P After work, Caroline came down. I believe she is about ready to rip the baby out of her uterus with a spoon. (5 weeks to go= not tiny. :P )

Catchup time- SUNDAY

Went to the ZenHome County Fair, or tried to, anyways. It was free admission day. BIG MISTAKE. It was literally so crowded that our arms were pinned to our sides. Took Mr. Samoa a minute to figure out why this was a problem. :P We went back later in the day and were more successful.

O.J. Slimebag

Guilty as charged of kidnapping, armed robbery, and ten other charges, thirteen years to the day after the original joke, er, trial.

You can't run forever, scumbag. Nicole and Ron, I hope you got to see. They may not have caught him on your deaths, but he's finally, finally where he belongs.

"The mills of God grind slowly, but they grind exceeding small. With patience stands He waiting, with exactness grinds He all." – Friedrich von Logau

Flea Follies

So White Kitteh had to go to the vet today. As it turns out, she is allergic to fleas. :P She got a cortisone shot to complement the flea treatment she got, and to help with the itching. Then, the birds got to hang out at the vet's while we flea-bombed. Yum! Death to fleas! :P

Sigh

So Nurse Ratchet apparently got overheard and chewed yesterday, because she was all up my butt being nice at the doctor's appointment today. (The results of same: yup, viral bronchitis, nope, nothing to do but wait it out and hit the albuterol and Mucinex. Oh, and monitor my blood pressure as I am sliding inexorably towards the Family Curse of high blood pressure. And, Nurse Florence and the doctor didn't think that waiting and letting my bronchioles close would have been such a hot idea either.)

But anyways. So Nurse Ratchet is asking alll about my life, I'm trying to extricate myself, and she goes, "Any babies?" (Note: The last time she saw me was June. That would've been the world's shortest pregnancy!) I did my usual and trilled, "Oh, no, just the furry kind. We're up to five cats and three dogs." That did the trick, as it often does, and she got off on the pet tangent. Immediate problem solved, but talk about OB. TUSE. !

I have decided to take this opportunity to share my distraction-from-baybeez lines with you, as they're all pretty funny.

1. "Oh, no, we stick to the furry kind. [insert babbling about pets here]." This one is really effective for some reason. An alarming number of people seem to feel that pets count. Not that I'm complaining!

2. "Oh, no, Caroline and I divided up the labor years ago. She's to have the babies, and I'm to spoil them." (Works great for relatives.)

3. (for work) "Great Scott, I already have seven! How many do you want me to have?!" (Our residents are the highest-needs home in the Shady Acres system, so this shuts up any Shady Acres employees and their relatives/friends.)

4. (if for some God-unknown reason none of the above work, which is highly unusual) "Um, I have fibromyalgia. If you think hobbling after a toddler is going to work, I'd like to know how!"

I seldom if ever make it to no. 4. Yay for smartasses!

Is an effing chest X-ray so unreasonable to want?

Turns out it is, at least if you're my doctor's nurse. :P

I woke up this morning, and not only did I not feel better, but it was hard to breathe. I advised work of same, and got on the horn to my regular doctor, getting his nurse. Nurse Ratchet, as it turned out.

First I couldn't convince Nurse Ratchet that I was, in fact, a patient of Dr. Good's. Finally accomplished that. So then she says that the soonest they could get me in is tomorrow afternoon. I expressed concern that something might need to be done sooner, being as I thought it was probably pneumonia. (It turned out to be viral bronchitis, but there was no way to know that without a chest X-ray at that point!) So Nurse Ratchet says snottily, "I really don't think it's going to go down hill that quickly." I decided at that point that there was no use dealing with her, agreed to the appointment, and hung up.

I got off the phone, and had a crying jag, not knowing what to do. Mom and Dad weren't home. So I called Mother Samoa, who advised to go to the emergency room at once. Mr. Samoa came home, and we toddled off and did so.

We got there, and the triage nurse listened to my breathing or lack thereof, shrieked in horror, and rushed me back to a room. One albuterol treatment and a set of chest X-rays later, it was determined that I had bronchitis. I am headed to the doctor tomorrow as planned, but he's going to hear about Nurse Ratchet. :P