To anyone considering subleasing an apartment: When you move out of it, you should advise the people that you are leasing it from, so that they can check it for damages. If nothing else, they will be a trifle peeved to learn the news that you are moving out a week early from the new tenant, who wants to know if SHE can move in early.
Which she cannot do. Because your darling boys, Damien and Chucky, have trashed the place. There are nails and nail holes in the walls, stickers on the closet door, the handle has been broken off the freezer (HOW???), there are holes in the walls and unidentifiable stains on the carpet, and graffiti on the picnic table. To say nothing of the smell of rotting corpses coming from the sink drain and the giant chunk of paint missing from the kitchen wall. Um, yeah. You're not getting THAT deposit back from the Zen-Samoas. Not that we could give it to you if we wanted to, because you have left no forwarding address.
(We have exactly six days of having to worry about our old lease left. We are not sorry.)
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